She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once