Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
it's like heaven, but drunker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize