Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
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