Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
actually, I'm a sock model
I think my vagina is haunted
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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