Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
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