I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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