That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
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speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
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Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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