I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
