i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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