there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
