Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize