He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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