If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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