Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
It's Friday. Sex?
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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