office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
