Can Purell be used as lube?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize