It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize