My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
