i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
