You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
