dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
