Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
