your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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