new low.... made out with someone while peeing
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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