I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize