i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
