4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
