I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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