I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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