I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
