I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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