Are we in a gay sports bar?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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