Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
