You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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