i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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