I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs