No awkward lesbian experiences without me
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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