He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize