Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
