whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
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So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
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I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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