chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Randomize
