And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Sober January is a disaster.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
