It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize