Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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