forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
