Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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