There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
