There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
