we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
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I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
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You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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