She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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