It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize